The Etiquette Czar`s Rules for Patriotic Protest
The White House press office is now
Miss Manners` office. President Obama`s press
secretary, Robert Gibbs, took to the television airwaves
this week to criticize congressional town hall
protesters for "yelling." Gibbs` underling, Bill Burton,
chastised voters not to
Instead, he advised America to engage in a
about health care, a real vigorous conversation about
How do they define
When does forceful dissent become intolerable
disruption? Herewith, the Obama Etiquette Czar`s
Official Rules for Patriotic Protest. Keep this guide
with you at all times to avoid being flagged by the
Democratic politeness monitors.
Congressional representatives cannot sell Obamacare with
mobs of unruly senior citizens and small-business owners
interrupting to press them on specific sections of the
bill. Limit your objections to a library whisper and
only challenge your lawmakers with hushed, dulcet tones.
Otherwise, you will scare them, and they will be forced
to hide behind teleconference calls, sick children at
hospitals or union bosses.
If, on the other hand, you are
attending a presidential town hall to show your
affection and approbation,
"spirited" chanting is acceptable.
"HANDS OFF HEALTH
"READ THE BILL!"
"I LOVE YOU,
"YES, WE CAN!"
Also permitted: Shouting
at historic inaugurations to protest war (as legions of
Code Pink activists did in 2005 during the
president`s address) and shouting,
"We didn`t cross the borders, the borders crossed us!"
to protest immigration enforcement (as thousands of
illegal alien supporters did during
raucous rallies in 2006).
Do refrain from
boisterous shrieking against those who accuse you of
lacking patriotism — unless you are Hillary Clinton,
bellowed at the top of her lungs in 2003:
"I am sick and
tired of people who say that if you debate and you
disagree with this administration, somehow you`re not
patriotic. We should stand up and say we are Americans
and we have a right to debate and disagree with any
No laughing. Snickering
at proponents of nationalized health care is rude,
bordering on political terrorism. Stifle all derisive
chuckling at bogus statistics and denials that Obamacare
will lead to long lines and rationed care. That would be
"evil-mongering," as Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid put it on
If, however, you are a member of
Congress confronted with silly questions about whether
you have read the bill, feel free to giggle. For tips on
executing acceptable levels of cackling, take a cue from
House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer.
"If every member
pledged to not vote for it if they hadn`t read it in its
entirety, I think we would have very few votes,"
Hoyer told CNSNews.com while choking back laughter after
a recent news conference.
"I`m laughing because a) I don`t know how long this bill is going to be,
but it`s going to be a very long bill." Tee-hee-hee.
No Nazi comparisons.
References to fascism are ugly and un-American.
Swastikas have no place in debates about nationalizing
20 percent of the economy. Swastikas may, however, still
be used as substitutes for the
and tattoos on the forehead of Darth Cheney.
No boorish questions.
"Real vigorous conversation" requires town hall attendees to
formulate queries that will encourage true debate. This
is not the time to ask why Congress won`t subject itself
to the health mandates it wants to foist on every other
American. This is not the time to ask how the White
House will pay for the massive Obamacare bureaucracy
without raising taxes on the middle class. The White
House endorsed model citizen questioning at its East
Room health care town halls in March and July, including
this: "Hi, Mr. President. I`m a member of SEIU, and I`m down here in Fairfax
County working on Change That Works. What can I do, as a
member of the union, to help you with your reform bill?"
No mean signs. That
11-year-old daughter of a Massachusetts Obama donor and
campaigner who was randomly chosen to criticize the
scary posters held up by town hall protesters in New
Hampshire was right.
are, well, mean. Never mind the placards that blared
"Bush is the only
dope worth shooting" in Nancy Pelosi`s San Francisco
and the assassination art depicting former President
Bush with a gun to his head in Chicago.
"Obama is a
socialist" is a sign too far and cannot be tolerated
in a civil society. Period.
Instead, print out the
"STAND UP FOR
HEALTH REFORM" signs helpfully produced by Obama`s
America, and burn your
"Don`t Tread on
Me" flags. Such rebellious sentiments are dangerous
To those of you who can`t abide by
The Rules: Shhhhhhhhh.
CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.
is the author of
Invasion: How America Still Welcomes Terrorists,
Criminals, and Other Foreign Menaces to Our
for Peter Brimelow`s review. Click
for Michelle Malkin`s website. Michelle Malkin
is also author of
Unhinged: Exposing Liberals Gone Wild
and the just-released Culture of Corruption: Obama and his Team of Tax Cheats, Crooks & Cronies.